And wedding planning has been great. Anyone who knows me can vouch that I am loving (almost) every minute of this. But one thing that has been incredibly overwhelming for me, and I'm sure every other bride-to-be, is the constant flow of opinions.
You all know the saying....
Whatever they are cooking is not going to turn out right. Way too many cooks in the kitchen. And while I do value the opinions of others, sometimes it feels as if the only ones who haven't given our opinions, are me and my fiance.
For example, I fell in love with something that I planned on using for the wedding. I thought it up in my mind, customized it, and used a vendor that brought it to life. Elated, I showed my closest family members. It might sound stupid, but when you work to create something so personal, you get very attached to it.
Now I don't want people to lie to me, but there is a difference between lying and being brutally honest. One person, whose identity will not be revealed, blurted out "Don't you think its gaudy?"
No. I didn't think it was gaudy. I wouldn't have worked on it perfecting every detail, and payed a nice chunk of change if I had thought it was gaudy. This was a bridezilla meltdown waiting to happen, and I threw my hands up and shouted "Then you know what? Maybe I'm gaudy!"
There are two lessons here. Lesson one: If a bride shows you something she is planning on using on the most important day of her life, you probably shouldn't trash talk it. Haven't you ever seen the Ugly Baby episode of Seinfeld?
Lesson two: Brides, including myself, should remember to take people's opinions with a grain of salt. Before I had shown everyone, my fiance and I both decided that we loved it, and that it was perfect for us. Those are the only two opinions that I should care about. But what can I say, sometimes it is (extremely) difficult to believe that not everyone is as in love with my wedding as I am.
Which brings me to another point. Maybe somewhere out there, there is a groom who wants to be involved with everything. I am not marrying one of those. At the beginning of wedding planning, I would show Ryan everything, asking him what he thought. He would give me a generic answer like "That's great" and I would get frustrated.
It took me awhile to realize that Ryan hasn't been dreaming of pocketfold invitations for his entire life, and unless it was terrible, he was probably going to like it. So now, whenever I have a planning decision to make, whether it be a style of something or a vendor to use, I give him my top two, and tell him to pick. This has worked out beautifully. It's actually made him more involved in the planning, because instead of just yessing me to death so he won't have to see another freaking rhinestone, he only has to look at two things, and pick the one he likes better.
Even if you haven't planned a wedding, surely everyone has felt overwhelmed by opinions at one time or another. Let me know how you dealt with it!
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